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Saturday, 29 December 2007

Sunday, 23 December 2007

  • I am trying not to make any decisions right now because i cant decide what i want in life. I had a long day. I want to be happy and i would be if i could figure out what makes me truly happy. I love when i dont want something and then once its gone i want it back again.. I think thats just natural. Im watching joel osteen.. hes good. I had a good day i saw friends i needed to see. i have to work tomorrow. im not happy about it.. i hate working

    im so mad. life is aggrivating sometimes when i cant have my way.

    I guess i will grow up.

     

     

  • I just realized something.. .. I want something i cant have.. and i have what i dont want..

     

    Maybe this is just life. Maybe its just how things work out. I lose something good because i treated it like i didnt need it when i had it. But now that i dont have it and its a year later.. I need it. I want it back because it was so comfortable. Im really upset now b/c until this point i didnt know what i cared so much. But i do. Its crazy because what i want back isnt mine and it doesnt want me to have it anymore. I pushed my limits and lost something good i think. Who knows maybe its not what i want but i have a good feeling i should have been different and maybe now i wouldnt be doing this. Gosh my life is so complicated.. I want to go back in time.. but im sure everyone does at some point in their life..I think its crazy how a year prior to this situation i would have never put two and two together i would have thought it would never happen.. them.. or us.. but we happened.. just like they happened.. im so confused. i hope i dont make myself out ot be a huge idiot.

    im happy dont get me wrong.. i just have thought a lot about what i want.. and i figured it out.. but its a matter of can i still have it?!?!

Saturday, 22 December 2007

  • i broke up with matt.. shocker right.. I am so weird. i wish i could like someone long enough to really like them. If that even makes sense. I was super pissed i took back his northface that i got him and feltners doesnt give money back in returns they give u a store credit. wtf. i dont want a store credit. I want the money i paid with. I dont even live here! But im done complaining. Zach and i got in a fight today. but for a good reason.. contrary to what he thinks i have good reason for what i say most of the time. clay and i went to eat lastnight then we watched a STUPID boring long movie at my house.. but hes good stuff.. i think we're going out again next week.. tomorrow night we are having out family christmas i am super excited.. i love our family stuff.. my freaking feet hurt so bad from working all day. I worked a ton.. from like 2-1030 thats crazy but i need the money so ill do it. I am so ready to unwrap all those clothes i bought over thanksgiving.. and shoes i love shoes.. ill stop rambling i need to get to bed for my day of WORK tomorrow.. yuck but hey its money..

     

    im gettin that fa sho

Thursday, 20 December 2007

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    Sara sara.. why are u so contrary?

    I can never make up my mind. Its like i find what i want and once i have it .. it annoys me. Not it just him. I hate drama so if you come into a relationship with drama consider it done before it starts. I am a bitch. I am. I want someone smart. And someone that can handle me. Someone who knows what the word nonchalant means..and who knows about the 08 election. I need someone worldly she says. They say stay away from small town but i keep getting sucked in. Its just my environment i swear. Hes different though.. its not even him i want. I want tobe happy.. I want to get into the summer program. I want to do what makes me happy. I hate school. My gpa is sooo bad.. It like hurts my feelings almost like i have multiple personalites. I am home for toooo long. I enjoy it but my dad and i havent been getting  along to well. Tomrrow night i am going out to eat and hanging out.. im super excited i jut dont know whawt im going to wear yet. I went in 3's company today stupid store. i love their clothes but the atmosphere makes me wanna yell.. I WEAR WALMART CLOTHES.. but i dont.. i could if i wanted to..  I went in EM jeans today super nice lady helped me.. i love that store i forever will shop there. I am currently still AWAKe talking to CC speaking of CC i saw corey today THAT was awkward.. I am loving some potential breakup song.. super! I am ready to see my friends. Im super tired of not sleeping which MAKES me tired and cranky..

     

    Great peace have they who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble.”- Psalm 119:165

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